Columbus Alive
November. 7th. 2002
by Miss Bella and Selena Lavinia

Skully's MMM Reunion Rocks!

If you’re hip on the scene, chances are you’ve heard of Mean Mr. Mustard’s. Though neither of us had the good fortune of visiting the club in its heyday, we’d always wondered about this campus legend. So on Saturday we found ourselves at Skully’s Music Diner for the Mean Mr. Mustard’s reunion party to discover what the hype was all about.

Standing outside, Paul Pecoskie was enjoying one of his first few nights working the door. He was being well-trained as a Door God by fellow employees Jessey Elmore and Joe Hopster. Joe told us, “There are way too many people here, but that’s a good thing!”

And he was right! As soon as we stepped in we were swept into the sea of people and couldn’t move without bumping into someone. But a packed bar is a sure sign you’re in the happening spot.

Who was this interesting couple? It was John Miskovich, aka Chynna, and Natasha Wortman, aka Ron Jeremy. We immediately noticed the pair because they’d switched genders for the evening. Natasha was getting quite a lot of attention with her hairy chest! John informed us, “Right now, Natasha’s sausage is bigger than mine!” We didn’t ask for details...

Other interesting fashion trends were noted. The Goddess Kali and Erica Stewart were decked out in heavenly duds. We hope Kali’s extra pair of arms didn’t fall off in the crowd! Much to our delight, Steve Jackson was there with his unique hairstyle.

Perhaps our favorites were Melyssa Mees, Robert Culp and Shawndy Murtha. With their dreds, countless body piercings, revealing outfits and makeup, they were quite the interesting trio. The three had attended the Red Zone Fetish Ball the night before, and Shawndy told us her band The Pantyliners won the costume contest! Meltdown entourage member Tony Reyes was intrigued by the piercings on her back, woven together like a corset. They looked painful but totally fierce!

Moving right along, we met Cathy Capuano and Chris Stankovich. Cathy owns B. Hampton’s in Victorian Village and invited us to do a Meltdown column at her bar. We’ve been to the happy hour on Fridays, and we admit it’s a happening scene that needs to be explored. Count us in, Cathy, and remember we love those chicken quesadillas!

Fave entourage member The Brahman Prince introduced us to Skully’s beautiful wife, Michele Webb. She was quite eager to find Miss Bella a hot man and started with sexy German med students Johannes Heverhagen and Hendrik VonTengg. After chatting with the boys, Michele helped us track down Skully, who was very busy but happy that everyone had come together to enjoy the music of Kevy Kev and Chuck Star. He told us, “Everybody who’s anybody is here tonight!”

As if on cue, local icon Damon Zex arrived with The Black Witch. Damon noted it was “crowded as hell in here.” We discussed our mutual dislike for the ugly lights that come on at closing time. Damon made a perfect suggestion: “Last call should be made illegal!” Of course Sir Thomas the Alcohol Man agreed, but for reasons other than bad lighting.

The line of people coming in the door just wouldn’t stop! Dove Blees waltzed in wearing a fashionable silver-studded leather jacket. Tessa Menhenett was checking out the party with Todd Rector and Darryll Grimmett, both who were sporting new hairstyles. They then posed for a pic with our fave bartender from Byrne’s Pub, Kathleen Hutton.

DJ Gods Doug Holmes and Mike Poe also arrived (after spending some time at other establishments). We love DJs, and those two are so sexy that we had to name both of them Hot Picks of the Night!

We couldn’t stand still any more and finally made our way to the packed dancefloor to join the high-energy crowd. It was so much fun dancing to ’80s electronica—the whole spectacle made us feel like we were in the movie 24 Hour Party People.

While busting our moves, we ran into Dan Dougan (of Little Brother’s fame), who was having a great time with his wife, writer Tracy Zollinger Turner.

The very well-built Steve Davidson stopped by to tell us how much he loved the crowd. We agreed—nobody was pretentious and everyone was having a great time. Steve introduced us to Security God Edge, who likened the party a family reunion! He told us the packed crowd was a “regular weekend at Mustard’s.”

Then Steve led us to Brad Miller, one of the original Mustard’s owners. He compared the evening at Skully’s to “how most people feel about a wedding—everybody’s here!” Brad also informed us that he’s a “stuntman for pornos.” According to Brad, “All the difficult shots you see? That’s me!” We left it at that.

As the night wound down, U2’s “Where the Streets Have No Name” was playing when the official announcement was made that the Mean Mr. Mustard’s Reunion Party is now an annual event! The crowd went wild with approval, and we mentally filed the info in our Meltdown agenda. If you missed the party, make room on your social calendar for next year! Trust us, this is an event not to be missed!

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